How do you have sex with a bicycle I ask myself? After I found the above photo I thought at the time that it was a good question. I was under the impression that I had some really perverted and dirty ideas when it comes to having sex with inanimate objects such as my new sex doll named Jemima. (I was always very attentive whilst watching Playschool). But I was proved wrong after I read this sex news article I found on the net.
Robert Stewart's story is apparently not the first of its kind in the UK. In 1993 Karl Watkins was locked up for having sex with pavements in Redditch. Karl wasn't kidding when he said he knew how to go down those manholes. Sorry for that Karl, but I couldn't resist. I hope we can still be friends.
Anyways, back to Robert the convicted sex offender, who is still serving a 3 year probation sentence. I am still curious, how could I actually screw my bike? Wouldn't it hurt both myself and my spare bike tire tool kit? I must admit that I do like to rub my lubricated hard cock against a pair of big fake plastic tits, but I hadn't thought to rub it up against a pair of bicycle handle bars. The frame of a black super sex webcam model is worth riding, but an alloy frame racing bike with a 10-speed Shimano gear system? I would of loved to have been one of the 2 female cleaners at the hostel, that stumbled upon Robert riding his bike along the bare back mountain terrain, because I carry my handycam where ever I go.
What does a bicycle fucker look like anyway? I found a good photo of the perverted Robert Stewart (below left) trying to look all cool and inconspicuous. It doesn't wash Robert, I know you are hiding a small bottle of bicycle chain lubricant in your left hand, whilst you are devising a twisted plan on how to mount my first BMX bike. Hands off my cum free handle bar padding, that's for my protection only.
I don't believe it, he looks exactly like my old Rugby coach. It all comes back to me now. His face obviously didn't become red by using his bike for its intended purpose. Instead, this nasty piece of work, probably removed the seat from its pole and shoved in his own hard shaft (without lubrication) and forced himself down the innocent bike's throat. Robert, do yourself a favour and get in contact with
Posh Spice and just borrow her new bike with the glass dildo seat. She will also help you lose weight by using the bike properly!!!
Cam2Sex readers - I thought I would share this with you to give insight into what some people are getting up to these days. Please be very careful where you leave your bikes, don't leave them unattended and without parental care. You don't know what might happen.
The Cam Lover
